Monday, June 11, 2012

Taboo questions



No matter what ethnicity you are you can probably think of more than one occasion where someone has asked you a question about your hair that has made you a bit uncomfortable. I can’t express how many times I have wanted to just tell someone off because of their ignorance especially in high school.

Some of the most common questions and comments people ask and say are....

“Can I touch your hair?” I have been asked this one almost all of my life. I didn’t really understand it and always took it the wrong way until I seen someone with hair that I wanted to touch. 
Normally when someone asks this question it’s because they have never encountered a specific hair type before and they are genuinely curious. It’s a natural human response to want to experience new things with all senses, so the next time someone wants to take a closer look at your hair don’t take it as them trying to place the spot light on you or make you feel awkward for being different. Take it as an opportunity to educate them on another ethnicity and explain to them the positive differences in your hair versus theirs.


“Are you ‘Mulatto’?” PEOPLE, I cannot stress to you how important it is that you do not use the word ‘Mulatto’. It is a dated word used during the days of slavery to refer to a child who was product of white a master raping a black slave. They were called Mulatto because it was thought that they, like Mules, would be infertile. NEVER REFER TO ANYONE AS MULATTO. There is no excuse. It is a racist term plain and simple. Also to assume that one has a certain texture of hair because they are of a certain background is horribly ignorant. For instance I am of a mixed background –Angolan, Scottish, Mi’Kmaq and Grenadian. The cultures that I am mixed with typically have thick, organic type 3 hair. I however have type 4C so you see to assume that my hair is the way it is because I am mixed is incorrect.

If someone asks you this question take a breath and step away from the situation for a second if you find yourself getting angry. Remember that some people just really don’t know that much about history and its not their fault for using words that they were taught to use. Educate them on why they should not use the word and then If you would like verse them on your background.

A better way to ask someone is to say something like this, “you have an interesting hair type, do you mind if I ask you your background?”

“It’s like a sheep” This phrase was coined on an episode of Family Guy where Stewy (a child) touched Cleveland afro textured hair. It should be obvious that to refer to the hair of an African American as the hair of an animal is rude, uncalled for and not funny. Anyone who has actually touched a sheep knows just how matted and mucky their wool feels before it is treated, not mention the stench of it. 

“Those aren’t curls!” I have had this said to me so many times as a kid and it hurt, because it made me feel like I was not who I thought I was. Please educate yourself on the different hair types before you go around telling people what type of hair they have. Just because someone does not have a visible type three curl pattern does not mean their hair is not ‘curly’ it just means they have more disulfide bonds in their hair then other people do.

“Oh my gosh, is your hair falling out?” often times when a person sees shed hair on their shoulders or back they know that it is more than likely just regular shedding. However for those who have longer hair it can seem to the average person as if someone is losing their hair because it looks like they are losing more. I should not have to tell you how tasteless this question is and that it will only result in worry for the person being asked. 

“You need to wash your hair....” This comment is rude, tactless and malicious. Sebum is oily substance that is excreted from the scalp to protect your hair. it is naturally occurring in all humans and should be viewed as such. It is not an indication of dirty hair, nor is dandruff. If you feel the hygiene of someone else is offending you try to step away from the person or situation. If you feel you must say something do it in private and use tact.

Now I don’t mean to offend anyone who has ever dared to utter these comments however they are ignorant and in some cases racist and politically incorrect. Plain and simple. Please take the feeling of other into consideration before you ask questions or respond to questions in a rude way and remember to do your research before you speak on topics you don't fully grasp. You may save yourself a major headache

Have you ever been asked a taboo question?? Tell us about it in the comments section